My great grandma had an answer for all those annoying kid questions I would drive her crazy with. I think her responses helped to make me into the smartass I am today 😉
A list of questions and her response:
What time is it? Time for all fools to be dead, what are you doing still here?
Where are you going? Up an elephants butt to see the sunrise
What for? Cat fur to make a pair of kitten britches, want the first pair, the second will have a hole in it.
~I never really got that one, but I’d always answer ‘Nope I want the first pair, give the holy one to J (my cousin)’
Make me? If I’d made you, I would have put ears and a tail on you and called you a jackass.
Why? Because I said so. (Why doesn’t that work with my kids??)
If you asked a question she didn’t have the answer for she’d simply respond Ask God when you get to Heaven and that was the end of it. And if we ever fought as kids she’d do 1 of 2 things: Pull out The Home Depot paint stirrers (which until I was 10 I thought were paddles), or say you two hush or I’ll make you hold hands and sing Jesus Loves Me, both of which seemed pretty cruel at the time.
Always nice to take a moment to remember those who have helped to shape our lives and mold us in to who we are today. Even though as a kid I was less than amused with her responses, they shut me up, and looking back they give me great memories to laugh and smile about.